ruba dub dub, accounting in a tub



if an expert accountant can make every company profitable, why doesn't every company hire themselves some brilliant accountants and become RICH? why does General Motors hire themselves some better accountants so they can compete against Toyota?!
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Yeah, the exceptions are being seen at Circuit City, where they fired all their experienced salespeople thinking they could cut costs with low-pay newbies who didn't need to know anything. It backfired.
http://advice.cio.com/bernard_golden/jeffrey_pfeffer_talks_about_evidence http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/retail/2007-03-28-circuit-city-layoffs_N.htm
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how about they fire all the top salespeople and replace them with more accountants. that way they would have no revenues but at least the accountants could cut all their cost, amortize expenses over 25 years, and cut checks to each other?
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true, so let's delineate the pecking order amongst these groups of people:
1) production/sales = top dogs, if no product, you have no business 2) management = visionaries and leadership differentiate winners from losers 3) marketing = a good marketing gimmick drives up sales and profits. bad marketing loses sales and kills off a business 4) banking = raising money is important; if stock price drops, key programmers will quit
And lowest on the pecking order are: secretary, photo copy boy, accountants, and the undocumented worker who empties the garbage cans late a night
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And the billings, accounts receivable, deposits, etc are all accounted for by, if not performed by-----TA DA !!!!!!!

Manangement makes many of their decisions based on reports of prior revenues and expenses (known as finaicial statements) and possibly from proforma (forward looking) financial statements, and budgets prepared by-----TA DA !!!!
How does management know what what their break even point is? How does manangement know what their fixed and variable costs are? Oh wait - they ask the accountant.

And the marketing budget, their actual expenditures, the accounts payable to marketing vendors, etc is managed by and reported on by -------TA DA !!!!!!
Besides, you can drive up sales and lose money. That is, if you don't know your break even price point.

And how would they know if not for the reporting of the revenues and expenses by ------- TA DA !!!!!

None of which happen without the financial reports prepared by and audited by-----TA DA !!!!!!
Accounting, and the accounting department, often times staffed with gosh - accountants - plays a crucial role in the business on a daily basis.
Oh yeah, all those people you mentioned above, the production and sales people, management people, marketing people, etc and so on......they want to get - like - paid and stuff. That is another function of the accounting department, performed by - accountants. No payroll - no happy employees.
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if you have to rely on highly dubious ad hoc cost allocation rules to determine whether you are "break even" or not (and whether your aspirin tablet is costing $2500 or not!), let me tell you something -- your accounting-based calculation aint worth the paper it's written on.

yeah, and what happens when you myopically fixate on your numbers? every few quarters, you wind up like citicorp and take a $17 BILLION dollar writeoff. bwahaaahahaha! I guess all those "break even" calculations their accountants so carefully worked out down to the last penny wasn't quite as accurate as they thought!!! bwaaaahaahhaaa!

and with your complicated, ad hoc appreciation and amortization and cost allocation rules, your calcuation aint worth anything either. At least I won't be hookwinked into believing a bogus set of senseless accounting numbers -- like those poor fellas at citibank, enron, worldcom, tyco, etcetera etcetara!
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And how do you propose to place a dollar amount on that? Hmmmmm?
You don't even know the cost of that paper.

That's not the accountant's call. That was management's call.
M A N A G E M E N T is responsible for the financial reports.
M A N A G E M E N T determines what their accounting policy will be.
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wrote:

So we are in agreement! Accountants are drones that carry out management's orders. Accountants are the tools of management to serve the interest of owners and shareholders. Accountants carry out managements order even if they hurt workers and the little guy. Accountants are foot soilders in green eyeshade who do as they're told.
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Accountants advise management.
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economic life is a tough concept to grasp, ea??
On Jan 23, 10:54pm, "mrs. eliza humperdink"

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I ~do~ bookkeeping, for sure. But there are so many other aspects of what I do for my clients, businesses, non-profits, trusts, estates and individuals, that the word "bookkeeping" doesn't quite cover the scope of services that are expected, demanded and provided.
I'm a resource that is necessary for my clients to be successful.
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wrote:

there's one service you definitely don't provide: bringing home the bacon. Accountants talk all they want, but they mainly shuffle paper and figures around. If they actually had personality and talent, they'd be in the outside generating business, making things, creating wealth for society.
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Actually I do.

If you want to look at it that way. That's all everyone does - right.

"in the outside"?
Is that what you hired them to do? Do you want the Controller at the hospital operating on you? Do you want the theology professor at the university handling the admissions papers and collecting the tuition? Do you want the cellist at the opera handling the business end of the theater, or have them "in the outside" selling tickets?
The question is, do you want all your employees out selling? If so, then fire everyone else - and I mean everyone else - then send the remainder of the workers "in the outside" to generate business. The thing is, you need to have a functioning office, which includes recordkeeping, accounting, payroll, sales tax, and financial reporting of one form or another. You probably don't want to bring in the "oil change guy" to keep the books.

And without the accounting, how will you know that wealth was created? .... and how will you know that ~~that~~ wealth was created and passed on to the owners of the business? Will you have the tools necessary to know what you could do to be more profitable, to create more wealth for the owners.....how will you know without accounting for your business transactions?
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gee whiz, are you saying that google or microsoft would not know they were making lots of money until some accountants told them that?
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They got where they are with the help of accountants more so than with the help of a geek.
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wrote:

so why is Google doing so much better than Yahoo nowadays? Is it because Google has better accountants?!
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says...

I quite curious - do you have a citation for that? Like a ranked list of occupations?
Thanks.
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On Jan 22, 2:41 pm, Coffee's For Closers <Usenet2...@THE-DOMAIN- IN.SIG> wrote:

no citation because it's false. the surest proof that accountants are dumb is to compare schools accountants graduate from to schools that smart people, like MBAs and doctors and lawyers, graduate from. We're talking UIUC versus Harvard.
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You are aware that Harvard has a very good business school.....and a good number of it's graduates work in accounting......and none of their MBA or Doctoral graduates would dis the accounting profession like you are.
They are, as you state, "smart people".
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wrote:

true.
false. find me one harvard MBA who has become a practicing CPA accountant.
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