HMRC has collapsed

Peter Saxton gurgled happily, sounding much like they were saying:

I'm not sure I'd start with HMRC, then...

I've been trying off-and-on to speak to them for the last three months regarding a notification to complete P35 for tax year 2009-10. Never once managed. The phone has rung a couple of times, but then goes to a "We're too busy to speak to the likes of you" message.

Shame the company in question was dissolved in 2007. And, yes, they do know. We've been through the hoops several times before.

Yes, companies get dissolved, I write to HMRC and phone them and tell them but they keep sending P35s.

They've obviously got time on their hands. Recently, they wrote a letter to my wife to tell her that they think she should be paying tax, and would probably be contacting her again (I don't think they said how) to sort things out. [She's actually £2000 inside the personal allowance threshold.] Why could they not simply have asked her to submit a tax return (the short one) like they used to do? That way, they would have everything sorted out in one go, and in a business-like manner.

I mean requests for P35s!

Why don't you just do all this by email. HMRC's email system is brilliant. I know this, because their email "instruction manual" runs to 197 pages.

Er... hang on.... oh...! Maybe you're talking about the outfit (unfit?) who....

... fine us for not doing stuff on line, but won't use emails;

... play pre-recorded messages lasting several minutes before saying "we're busy, please call again later";

... store all outgoing snail-mail for 7 working days before despatching it;

... constantly ask you to prove negatives, because they falsely claim that "information has come to their attention";

... don't read the white space on returns;

... fine us for genuine errors but never apologise for their own;

... etc etc.

Still, they get huge bonuses, index-linked pensions, duvet holidays etc. so they must be doing something right.

What are duvet holidays? The idea conjures up the spectre of a kind of genetic purification exercise in which tax inspectors are encouraged to go on holiday with each other, in the hope that one thing will lead to another, thereby producing a new super-breed of mega-evil inspectors.

Ronald calm down.

You've missed out the fortunes spent on publicity material telling us how great they are and how easy everything is going to be for us.

I only have a couple of staff and am using the Employer CD-ROM which is supposed to upload the end year returns but mine fails. Do you think I can get any help? Impossible to get through by phone, try email and - oh sorry this is the wrong department - try xxxx. So try xxxx and an immediate acknowledgement and a week later still no action.

OK I'll try and do it the longer way round but what a farce.

Did anyone find out what duvet holidays are?

Actually, what they get is:-

No bonuses, not even psayrises

Their contratcs changed to reduce any entitlement to redundancy pay

redundancy notices

twice the workload because half their colleagues have been made redundant

Simon

They work in Special Investigations

All Civil servants get a set number of Annual Leave. They have to give a minimum notice of three days to take time of. I would say that our employer very generously said that they would forgo this notice period if they were suck abroad during the no fly zone. If they havent got any leave left, the generous empliyer would allow them to take leave without pay and not treat the absence as a conduct and disciplin offence.

It's phoning up in the morning and saying that you're not coming in that day.

IME it's usually an (accepted) miss-use of a sickness allowance

tim

In message , tim.... writes

That is also my understanding. Some Companies unofficially give a number of accepted days sick leave on top of the official holiday allowance.

Those who haven't used up their allocation of sick days sometimes take a duvet day where they call in sick on the basis that they don't want to get out of bed that morning.

In message , Simon wrote

Then they are just falling into line with what a lot of 'private' industry has been doing for years.

Falling in line, this has been HMRC or IR since I can remember, and I have been there 35 years. Now accountants on the other hand!

Back to the original issue, I took a similar problem to my "allocated " Customer Relations Manager will some degree of success.

Dave

Whenever I get to 'irate stage', I telephone any district that will reply and ask for the department to whom formal complaints must be addressed.

I have always been passed to a higher grade officer. Sometimes the matter is resolved as a result. If not I write my letter marking it cc the client's member of parliament at the House of Commons and add an instruction to send it by recorded delivery. This has never failed but importantly it ensures that deadlines can be passed because evidence of my attempt to meet then is now documented.

I rarely have to go this far but I have done so on several occasions.